http://thescholarlynail.blogspot.ca/2012/10/the-scholarly-nails-halloween-giveaway.html?spref=fb
I tried to put this on the sidebar..but then I realized, I have no sidebar...so I googled how to do it. ... but then I couldn't find the dashboard... perhaps it's the theme that doesn't allow for sidebars, or my lack of blogdesign skills that prevents me from achieving a sidebar...
Oh well. Hey look a nail polish giveaway!
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Skinning Oranges
If I looked back at my life, I would probably relax more...
I'd enjoy spending time with my 2nd aunt just as much as I did years ago. I guess again and again I learn to love more because life is short, but lately I've been increasingly frustrated with where I am at.
I think the person that I take for granted the most after my parents would be Vince. So because no one really reads my blog, cept for the curious few and because I miss him here are some little things I noticed and appreciate:
Skinning Oranges for me to devour:
I'll never forget the first time I went to eat dinner at your house. It was awkward. At the end of it though, I was really touched by how you peeled oranges for your frail wrinkly grandma. Then you peeled me one too, and the best part is you never stopped.
It's weird that this is always the first thing I mention when I think about why I date you. It is a very selfless gentle act of service, not even for me at first, but you included me in it. I guess the way to my heart is through my stomach.
I'd enjoy spending time with my 2nd aunt just as much as I did years ago. I guess again and again I learn to love more because life is short, but lately I've been increasingly frustrated with where I am at.
I think the person that I take for granted the most after my parents would be Vince. So because no one really reads my blog, cept for the curious few and because I miss him here are some little things I noticed and appreciate:
Skinning Oranges for me to devour:
I'll never forget the first time I went to eat dinner at your house. It was awkward. At the end of it though, I was really touched by how you peeled oranges for your frail wrinkly grandma. Then you peeled me one too, and the best part is you never stopped.
It's weird that this is always the first thing I mention when I think about why I date you. It is a very selfless gentle act of service, not even for me at first, but you included me in it. I guess the way to my heart is through my stomach.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Run: stream of conscieness..
I had a fight with my parents about who would be dropped off first. My mom won and angrily I went to girls group. I wasn't even late, I was even early but still I was angry.
I had girls group. They refresh my soul.
I don't know why I always delay going, I love them, they love me.
We are in the fellowship of Christ in that group. I feel it, we are there for each other.
I just wish that I would run to God first.
His plans, his wisdom and grace is so much more than my petty jealousies my insecurities.
What a fool I am.
Dear Lord,
Thank you for giving me life, love, and let me forgive.
Help me forgive, help me let go.
Help me love myself.
Help me Love.
Forgive me.
Bless me.
Heal me.
Amen.
I had girls group. They refresh my soul.
I don't know why I always delay going, I love them, they love me.
We are in the fellowship of Christ in that group. I feel it, we are there for each other.
I just wish that I would run to God first.
His plans, his wisdom and grace is so much more than my petty jealousies my insecurities.
What a fool I am.
Dear Lord,
Thank you for giving me life, love, and let me forgive.
Help me forgive, help me let go.
Help me love myself.
Help me Love.
Forgive me.
Bless me.
Heal me.
Amen.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
PAIN
Coming back, and being here is hard when jobs and education plans fail me, it's hard when your granny is dying and your dad can't go see her...or maybe doesn't want to. It's hard when you think that everyone else has a leg up on you because they didn't have to go thru the stuff you went thru. And finally when you think you've reached your limit, God pushes you beyond it.
For the past two weeks, I've been crying at night for a way out. Raging at God or family or friends when some of the things I'm going thru are out of my control, while others are. It doesn't matter when you feel like you made of lead, something toxic and heavy and cold and you are falling deeper and deeper into a deep artic ocean trench. You swim, but it's the wrong direction, you cry out but help can't reach you.
Sometimes friends help, mostly not... unless I feel like they understand, even though I know they care, but there's only so much I can take, my fears of being left alone by friends or fears of being a loser or whatever.
Call me crazy, judge me, think that it's a cry for attention, think as you please. It's hard to be real, hard for me to share like this, I put it out there not because I've mastered anything but because right now I'm over it.
LOVE
To you maybe it's nothing much but to me, I have hope now that things will get better. If you are tagged, you are apart of helping me. Thank you.
Whats that? How did I heal?I don't know, it's not through trying to find your worth thru friends or past success. Maybe it was time I got over myself or maybe it was God and his unfailing love. It was the week after a fight with my dad and the 6 days of silence and hiding from family ending in a quiet talk with my parents. I knew I was loved but was i still didn't feel it was safe. It was every little step I took from coming home instead of running away, I came home to the succulent smell of beef brisket stewing and my mom's cooking, one of my favourites. It was bumping into John and him giving me a bottle of grape juice from Japan and talking of hooking me up with a cell phone plan (the kindness of a stranger almost). It was a little music box that I cranked to help me smile. It was everytime you spent time with me, every hug you have, every smile you turned my way. Everytime you listened, everytime you prayed.
HEALING
... That I realized yes, I'm going through hard times, it is beyond what I can bear, but God as blessed me with so much, how could I be so blind to everything He has blessed me with? He saved me from famine, from poverty, from war, from divorce, from disease, from sin... from death, and gave me life, love and hope.
Next time, please ask me to give praise it is good for the soul, gives you hope, and you rely on God for that. =P
“Love is the medicine for the sickness of the world.” Karl Menninger
Coming back, and being here is hard when jobs and education plans fail me, it's hard when your granny is dying and your dad can't go see her...or maybe doesn't want to. It's hard when you think that everyone else has a leg up on you because they didn't have to go thru the stuff you went thru. And finally when you think you've reached your limit, God pushes you beyond it.
For the past two weeks, I've been crying at night for a way out. Raging at God or family or friends when some of the things I'm going thru are out of my control, while others are. It doesn't matter when you feel like you made of lead, something toxic and heavy and cold and you are falling deeper and deeper into a deep artic ocean trench. You swim, but it's the wrong direction, you cry out but help can't reach you.
Sometimes friends help, mostly not... unless I feel like they understand, even though I know they care, but there's only so much I can take, my fears of being left alone by friends or fears of being a loser or whatever.
Call me crazy, judge me, think that it's a cry for attention, think as you please. It's hard to be real, hard for me to share like this, I put it out there not because I've mastered anything but because right now I'm over it.
LOVE
To you maybe it's nothing much but to me, I have hope now that things will get better. If you are tagged, you are apart of helping me. Thank you.
Whats that? How did I heal?I don't know, it's not through trying to find your worth thru friends or past success. Maybe it was time I got over myself or maybe it was God and his unfailing love. It was the week after a fight with my dad and the 6 days of silence and hiding from family ending in a quiet talk with my parents. I knew I was loved but was i still didn't feel it was safe. It was every little step I took from coming home instead of running away, I came home to the succulent smell of beef brisket stewing and my mom's cooking, one of my favourites. It was bumping into John and him giving me a bottle of grape juice from Japan and talking of hooking me up with a cell phone plan (the kindness of a stranger almost). It was a little music box that I cranked to help me smile. It was everytime you spent time with me, every hug you have, every smile you turned my way. Everytime you listened, everytime you prayed.
HEALING
... That I realized yes, I'm going through hard times, it is beyond what I can bear, but God as blessed me with so much, how could I be so blind to everything He has blessed me with? He saved me from famine, from poverty, from war, from divorce, from disease, from sin... from death, and gave me life, love and hope.
Next time, please ask me to give praise it is good for the soul, gives you hope, and you rely on God for that. =P
“Love is the medicine for the sickness of the world.” Karl Menninger
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Dear God, Have mercy
I cry, I rage and I try
to myself again I die.
What's enough, when to stop?
Why the pain, why the knot?
Why become I someone I'm not?
Build me, break me
but leave my heart alone
For along my slender sleeve,
T'is my only heart to die
"Have mercy!" I cry,
Tho none was spared for you
where upon the cross you died
alone but pure, true love personified.
to myself again I die.
What's enough, when to stop?
Why the pain, why the knot?
Why become I someone I'm not?
Build me, break me
but leave my heart alone
For along my slender sleeve,
T'is my only heart to die
"Have mercy!" I cry,
Tho none was spared for you
where upon the cross you died
alone but pure, true love personified.
Sunday, February 4, 2007
Heartbroken : A Chinese Village
My mom came back from China and HK and when she was in my grandparent's village I heard of many heart breaking things. About a year ago the small stream that runs through the tiny village overflowed it's bank and unfortunately that area was hardest hit.
" You could see from one of the few 3 storey houses, that didn't get washed away, that the flood line went up into the second floor" said my mom.""In the village shop owners and their families lived in the back of their shops and when the waters came, they didn't want their things to be washed away so they closed the gates. However the waters just kept rising and all of them died inside their shops. People were afraid to open the gates because a family of dead bodies would immediately pile out. It was horrible. The reek of it all stank to the the heavens, of animals and humans. The roads were all washed out and everything was coated in stinking mud. They said that sometimes they would be walking on a particularly slippery section, and it took a while before you noticed that you were standing on a body covered in mud. So many people died and now many of them are homeless, orphans and widows and everyone is having a hard time trying to survive."
I (my mom) was walking down the street with my sister, her husband and my cousin ( My grandpa is the 2nd oldest of 9 children ) when she pointed out that the man there was my 8th uncle. To put it rudely, he looked like a beggar. His coat was filthy and his pants a patchwork of fabrics. He wore cloth shoes and never owned socks. (My mom and her sister were both clad in a down parka and thermal underwear, the works, and she was STILL freezing.) His job was to gaurd the parking lot and he lived in a shack on the dirt road just off the corner of the parking lot. He had took a number of bricks and stacked them into four square columns and he found few sheets of scrap metal that he put on top for a roof. He had no form of heating inside. He said to me, "Oh, nice to meet you, I've just made some duck kidney congee, would you like me to scoop you a bowl?"I couldn't stand it, I started to cry. Later, I found that he kept all the clothes he had, in a salted duck egg jar. He said that this way, the mice wouldn't be able to chew on it, and also that if the river over flooded again his belongings would be safe. As poor as he was however, when people gave him things he would always go and offer it to his older brother (his only brother that is still alive ) who had a family of his own. He was very cheerful despite his horrible living conditions.
That's what my mom said over the phone to her friends. When I heard this, I got pretty emotional and I agree with my mom when she said, " It's hard to imagine that a relative of mine would live the way a beggar does ". My mom left this village, and left behind all her other jackets and as much clothes as possible. There are more stories that she told, but I'll leave it for another update.
" You could see from one of the few 3 storey houses, that didn't get washed away, that the flood line went up into the second floor" said my mom.""In the village shop owners and their families lived in the back of their shops and when the waters came, they didn't want their things to be washed away so they closed the gates. However the waters just kept rising and all of them died inside their shops. People were afraid to open the gates because a family of dead bodies would immediately pile out. It was horrible. The reek of it all stank to the the heavens, of animals and humans. The roads were all washed out and everything was coated in stinking mud. They said that sometimes they would be walking on a particularly slippery section, and it took a while before you noticed that you were standing on a body covered in mud. So many people died and now many of them are homeless, orphans and widows and everyone is having a hard time trying to survive."
I (my mom) was walking down the street with my sister, her husband and my cousin ( My grandpa is the 2nd oldest of 9 children ) when she pointed out that the man there was my 8th uncle. To put it rudely, he looked like a beggar. His coat was filthy and his pants a patchwork of fabrics. He wore cloth shoes and never owned socks. (My mom and her sister were both clad in a down parka and thermal underwear, the works, and she was STILL freezing.) His job was to gaurd the parking lot and he lived in a shack on the dirt road just off the corner of the parking lot. He had took a number of bricks and stacked them into four square columns and he found few sheets of scrap metal that he put on top for a roof. He had no form of heating inside. He said to me, "Oh, nice to meet you, I've just made some duck kidney congee, would you like me to scoop you a bowl?"I couldn't stand it, I started to cry. Later, I found that he kept all the clothes he had, in a salted duck egg jar. He said that this way, the mice wouldn't be able to chew on it, and also that if the river over flooded again his belongings would be safe. As poor as he was however, when people gave him things he would always go and offer it to his older brother (his only brother that is still alive ) who had a family of his own. He was very cheerful despite his horrible living conditions.
That's what my mom said over the phone to her friends. When I heard this, I got pretty emotional and I agree with my mom when she said, " It's hard to imagine that a relative of mine would live the way a beggar does ". My mom left this village, and left behind all her other jackets and as much clothes as possible. There are more stories that she told, but I'll leave it for another update.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
I didn't do so well on my neural plasticity paper... I either didn't work hard enough or didn't have the science background to understand the stuff that I read.
So I guess I've got to try again...but I wonder what would have happened if I were doing something I was actually talented in?
What can you do with art? I've no training and I don't really see how it would help anybody.
So I guess I've got to try again...but I wonder what would have happened if I were doing something I was actually talented in?
What can you do with art? I've no training and I don't really see how it would help anybody.
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